~ OCTOBER 2022 ~
Let’s go on an adventure into pleasure-packed, unexplored territory—namely, the perineum: a nerve-rich pleasure center with massive orgasmic potential.
Colloquially known as the “taint,” the “gooch,” or the “grundle,” the perineum is the area between the anus and the scrotum or vagina. Massaging the perineum can enhance other forms of sexual stimulation, and it can even lead to orgasm on its own.
“It’s such a great option to add to edging, especially because it can help engorge all necessary body parts,” says Dr. Evan Goldstein, D.O., founder and CEO of Bespoke Surgical, a leading private practice specializing in sexual health and wellness, and co-founder of the sex care brand Future Method.
According to Dr. Carlton Thomas, M.D., who offers sexual health tips on his TikTok and Instagram accounts, perineum stimulation is especially pleasurable for people with pa prostate. “While the [prostate] area can be reached internally, external, firm pressure on the perineum can also stimulate the prostate from the other side,” he explains.
How to Have a Perineum Orgasm
You might be wondering how it is that you haven’t heard about perineum pleasure or perineum orgasms before now. Given the inconsistencies in sex education around the country, many of us aren’t fully aware of our pleasure centers or even our own anatomy.
For cisgender men in particular, stigma might stand in the way of exploring areas beyond the penis. According to Dr. Goldstein, it’s hard for some guys to get comfortable with perineum play, but once you try it, you might find it relaxing.
“In a culture where most people are Type A or are wanting more control of their destiny, [perineum stimulation] is a great way to realign with what is important,” Dr. Goldstein says. “You deserve this pleasure.”
Are you ready to experience all that your perineum has to offer? Let’s get into the fun stuff.
Start exploring on your own.
Before you bring a partner into the mix, it’s a good idea to explore your perineum on your own. That way, you can identify the kinds of sensations you like.
“[The perineum] is like a spider web of muscles that support the pelvic floor,” Dr. Goldstein explains. “They all basically converge with one another into a single unit. With that said, gentle pressure along or against the belly of the muscle is a great way to start.”
After you’ve used your fingers to apply gentle pressure for a while, Dr. Thomas recommends trying different forms of digital stimulation. “Some prefer the sensual tickle of light touch, while others prefer a deeper form of pressure with a slight rubbing motion,” he says.
Once you find a sensation that feels good, keep going! You can just focus on your perineum or you can add in other forms of stimulation, like penis stroking or anal penetration with your fingers or a butt plug.
Even if you don’t reach orgasm from perineum stimulation alone, applying some pressure to the area can still help you get closer to climax. Dr. Goldstein explains that massaging the perineum enhances blood flow in the pelvic region, which can lead to stronger erections. It also draws prostatic fluid into the prostate and encourages the movement of sperm, which begins the process of preparing your body for orgasm.
Use a sex toy.
If you’re happy with what your hands have to offer, then keep up the great work! But if your perineum craves more intense stimulation, using a vibrator can upgrade your pleasure game.
Dr. Thomas suggests holding a simple, external vibrator—such as a bullet vibrator or a wand—against your perineum. Start on the lightest setting. Then work up to whatever intensity that feels best for you.
For even more stimulation (and potentially hands-free orgasms), opt for a dual prostate and perineum massager. The Bruno by Lelo and the Vector by We-Vibe are both vibrating butt plugs that also provide perineum stimulation. You can operate both of these toys with a remote (the Vector even syncs with an app!), so you don’t have to reach around and fumble with the buttons. Just don’t forget to use lube!
Try it with a partner.
Once you’re comfortable exploring your perineum on your own, try it with a partner. You can wear a dual prostate and perineum massager while you’re rolling around together, or you can ask your partner to stroke, lick, or gently press against your perineum while you kiss, have P-in-V sex, receive oral sex, or do anything else that’s fun and hot for the both of you. Letting a partner explore this part of your body can be an incredibly vulnerable experience, so it’s important to try this with a partner you trust.
“The goal is to just let your body fully relax and give into this submission,” Dr. Goldstein says. “Having a seasoned partner who completely understands the skin’s and muscle’s sensitivities will greatly enhance your chances of this hands-free orgasm.”
What does a perineum orgasm feel like?
Since perineum massage stimulates the prostate from outside the body, a perineum orgasm is technically a prostate orgasm. Some people who’ve had prostate orgasms say they’re longer, more intense, and more “full body” than orgasms from penis stimulation alone.
Don’t get bent out of shape if you don’t reach orgasm the first few times you try perineum stimulation. According to Dr. Thomas, perineum play is about the journey—not the destination. “Not everyone can achieve orgasm through perineal stimulation alone, and most people need simultaneous stimulation of the penis to orgasm,” he explains. “But it’s so much fun to try.”
If you can’t have an orgasm through the perineum or find you just aren’t that into this kind of stimulation, that’s perfectly OK, too. Every single body is different, and not everyone has orgasms in the same way.